this is who i am: 05/01/2005

Tuesday, May 31, 2005

[sensitive] fuck.. maybe i was just being too sensitive but i was pissed off yest after band.. what a fucked up remark.. and the day went rather well.. ah fuck it whatever.. well at least my parents will be coming for my concert this time.. they've never attended a single one of my performances in my entire band career but then again, i've never asked them to come haha.. oh well.. nice way to end my band career, it'll be my last full concert.. the alumni performance doesn't really count, playing 3 easy pieces only.. anyway whee! my birthday's this sat. hehe.. should i go off to malaysia for a couple of days with my family? hmm.. ah well.. lets see.. my wishlist for this year: the orange crumpler, a tama starclassic set(unrealistic but what the heck), a new pair of shoes, a new mp3 player and a new pair of oakleys.. been listening to a lot of american marching bands lately and damn why can't singapore have like really good marching bands, something comparable to jap ones or even better american ones, or marching bands in university.. it'll be so much fun but then again tt'll be damn scary.. their percussionist are insanely gd, it's like a totally different class from the standard down in singapore.. we're probably considered only kids standard to them haha.. how sad.. ah well.. i'm off to some other retarded stuff

5/31/2005 08:04:00 AM

Saturday, May 21, 2005

[multitude] i'm so in love with multitude.. the percussion parts just rock!!! damn it lah.. the snare part is so nice but my toms part is equally nice too!!! i've been listening to it over and over again non-stop for like 20 times.. and it's only the RJC recording, wonder how the professional recording sounds.. sweet!!! gloriosa is really nice too.. anyway amb alumni's gonna play lord of the dance!! so fun!! but never heard of the other 2 pieces.. gonna ask mr yea if we can play either gloriosa or multitude instead.. hehe.. sorry can't get enuff of those pieces.. firestorm will be nice too but i doubt we can pull any of it off even we did try haha.. haha having so much fun bitching with daryl abt syf right now.. so fun having frens from other bands who feel the same way abt this yr's syf.. the injustice done to both ac and rj.. sheesh.. oh well.. i'll get back to bitching haha..

5/21/2005 09:36:00 PM

Thursday, May 19, 2005

[happy happy] haven't felt this happy and hyper in quite a while.. probably got something to do with the no. of hours i slept last nite.. haven't been having enough slp lately so i guess the sudden 9hrs of slp really rejuvenated me haha.. i liked the feeling, felt so perky and alive for once.. a gd change from the weird feelings i've been having the past few days.. was like in a sudden state of sadness for no apparent reason.. hmmm.. anyway HAPPY BIRTHDAY GUAN!!! darren and guan are so cute.. they'd really make such a nice couple.. ah well.. A levels come first ay.. wah damn sad i didn't get to go watch star wars today.. everyone had like their own plans.. sian ah.. and the worst thing is i'm listening to star wars now, so irritating.. but nice piece, tokyo kosei did a really gd job on it haha.. can't wait for the next band prac, i've practically memorised multitude already and i never even really studied my score, just like ran through the various parts in my head over and over again.. the subdivisions are really tricky so i guess the best way is to just memorise.. bored bored bored.. i'm so sick of sch.. so boring and monotonous, just can't wait for As to be over.. even going to the army would be a gd change.. but i definitely dun mind going to sch for just band prac haha.. anyway NAPFA TMR!!! ARGH!!! shit.. i'm actually scared.. 2.4k run is really gonna be a test of my will power.. i can't afford to fail it again this time.. so damaging to my ego..hmmm.. i got this sudden urge to learn how to play the trumpet, it seems like so much fun.. hmmm.. maybe i'll go try like in my own free time.. ok i'm getting really random but heck.. i kinda miss playing symphonic overture, such a beautiful piece.. the chosen is a really beautiful piece too, the slow portion is bloody well-composed.. the whole jazzy rhythm thingy is so cool.. hmm.. i think i'd better go get some rest, dun wanna wake up feeling all cranky tmr.. feels gd to be happy..

5/19/2005 09:47:00 PM

Sunday, May 15, 2005

[ke-rash] yesterday's band prac seemed impossibly short.. but it was really fun.. i like the songs we're playing or at least the ones tt we played yesterday.. I LOVE MULTITUDE.. my tom parts just rock!! whee.. firestorm's really nice too but i got no major parts in it so nvm.. but sadly i might not get to play mallets for this concert after all, boris was thinking of scrapping best songs ever.. oh well.. nvm.. lets play aquarius!! haha.. anyway finally got the recording of acjc's singapore rhapsody and symphonic overture.. rhapsody was really gd, probably the most interesting and non-flat performance tt was played tt day.. overture was pretty gd too, though there were mistakes made but i think they were enough to cost us tt 1.6marks.. how sad.. oh well.. no point groaning over it now.. we still got invited for WASBE's opening concert haha.. ah well.. i think i'd better get ready to go out, going to jeremy's place for house warming.. should be fun.. i hope..

5/15/2005 11:55:00 AM

Friday, May 13, 2005

[cough cough] urgh.. my throat feels so damn uncomfortable, been coughing the whole damn day.. yeah anyway.. feel so sad over napfa i got A for pull-ups, A for sit-ups, A for shuttle run, C for sit-and-reach, C for standing broad jump and guess wat.. a did not complete for 2.4k run.. wah damn sad.. it started out pretty ok first round was pretty gd but by the mid of my 2nd round my heart started beating eratically and by the 3rd round i was finding it impossible to breathe.. i wonder wat's wrong with me.. is it a mental thing? but tt doesn't explain why my heart beats so unusually fast and i get breathless so easily.. irritating.. nvm i shall overcome this obstacle and get my gold for napfa again this year.. anyway saw her alot today, so happy hehe. but the most i got to do was like smile and say hi.. oh well.. YES!! tmr got band prac!! woohoo!! finally get to start practicing on my parts.. was so irritated when i couldn't sight read them properly on tuesday and i'm actually gonna play a mallet piece since i gave jit the drum set part though i really do want the drum set part for myself.. oh well i'm a gd fren haha.. really got alot of work to do before vch concert next month and we only got 9pracs including tmr.. madness but heyhey we're acjc concert band and we're gd haha.. and whee!!! we've been invited to perform for WASBE's opening concert.. i think tt's better than being in the presentation.. shiokness..

5/13/2005 08:20:00 PM

Sunday, May 08, 2005

[bored out of my mind] today has to be the most boring day ever for the past few months.. can't stand it.. i'm literally rotting at home doing nothing really productive but try to study complex numbers for tmrs test.. couldn't really absorb anything cos my brain's on holiday.. ah well.. managed to download some pretty nice songs, really needed to new stuff to listen to, was getting sick of my old mp3s.. oh and syaz's samba-licious song really rocks, i think i'll join his perc band some time soon.. i miss playing in a perc band, ahh the gd old days of heartbeat.. arghh.. another 2days to band prac.. my hands are really getting damn itchy.. got the urge to just play something and i haven't touched the drum set in months.. wonder how rusty i've gotten but at least my double stroking has improved, can try and do some fancy rhythms, if i can come up with any haha.. ahh well.. i think i'll go get some slp.. gd nite

5/08/2005 10:23:00 PM

Saturday, May 07, 2005

[empty inside] woke up feeling so weird, actually terrible.. just felt so incredibly empty inside cos for the first time in 2wks i'm waking up late and not have to report for band early.. i didn't go sch today cos we were supposed to go up on stage but i just couldn't bring myself to do it.. i know i'll just break down and cry on stage.. so i just spent the whole day tryna make myself feel better.. ended up playing ft as usual.. heh.. it's only been one day and i miss band so much already.. can't wait for the next band prac.. i wanna get back to practicing for the june concert and i know everyone else does too.. cos we're gonna prove tt we're not just a gold medal band.. we're better than tt and everyone knows it.. i love acjc band and dr lee, i've never felt so much affinity for a band before, not even when i was in amb.. there's just something abt ac band tt makes me wanna work hard and do my best for it, and after searching for the answer for so long, i realised tt it's the people within the band.. ppl like ben pooi, boris, este, faidhi, basically everyone and especially dr lee.. their commitment, love and passion for the band, music and their instruement really gave me the strength and urge to push myself and strive for excellence in my playing, to not wanna let them down and i believe tt yesterday, i gave my all and did them proud.. i dare say tt i was the best cymbal player yesterday and i know many will be there to back me up.. i had dedicated every ounce of my hard work and effort to the pride of the band.. and i'm sure everyone felt the same way towards their playing too yesterday cos it was really the most emotion-filled and best performance tt we've ever put up.. as we were on stage i could really say tt our hearts our hopes and our aims were one, and we stood together for the cause of ACS forever.. so i just wanna thank the band for bringing out the best in me and especially dr lee, the man i respect the most.. he is more than just a conductor to me, he's a teacher, a mentor and a father figure, and i appreciate all tt he has done for me.. thank u acjccb for allowing me to be a part of this experience, it's one tt i'll never forget.. anyway went to fish & co. glasshouse just now for huiying's bdae celebration, it was kinda fun, small private lil affair with close frens.. but it was so embarrassing lah.. daniel was like "marrying" off my daughter to you.. i just didn't know where to put my face, i was so embarrassed but kinda happy too hehe.. but yeah.. i'm such a chicken haha.. dunno why but i just really dun dare talk to girls tt i hardly know which includes her.. tt sucks.. at this rate i'll never talk to her haha.. ah well.. gotta go gather my balls some time soon.. heh.. anyway it's getting late maybe i'll try to get some slp..

5/07/2005 12:26:00 AM

Thursday, May 05, 2005

[boohoo] today's a sad day.. i swear i will never forget this day.. i can't really say we lost cos we made history by being the first opening band ever to get gold.. but on the other hand, we were hoping for more.. unfortunately wat we played just wasn't wat the judges wanted.. but honestly.. ahh nvm.. this is a sensitive issue, dun wanna cos any problems with other bands.. just dun get it though.. but despite of all that, we know we played our best and we gave our all.. for once the band stood there with one heart and one mind.. never felt so much unity in the band before but it felt really gd.. ACJC CONCERT BAND ROCKS MY SOCKS!!! love u guys so much!!! and percussion i couldn't have been more proud of u guys today, great job!! well next up on the agenda, june concert.. we'll show who really is the best band out there.. anyway just for the sake of jillyan's enjoyment.. and i definitely hope u're reading this (see i'm so nice right) so here it goes.. i talked to her for a bit today.. handed her a card and some chocs to like wish her gd luck.. think it's rather insignificant lah.. but heh.. made me feel better after doing it.. and well i made a futile attempt to console her too just now but note the keyword "futile" haha.. anyway i'm gonna go wollow in my sorrow *sobsob*

5/05/2005 10:18:00 PM

Monday, May 02, 2005

[ego-bursting] urh.. my ego got so hurt today lah.. dr lee said sazali looked better than me.. bahh.. watever lah.. hmmph.. haha.. anyway went to s.c.h. for a 15min soundcheck.. urgh.. disgusting we played so horribly bad today.. just wanted to die.. so embarrassing.. the most we would've gotten was a silver or maybe by a stroke of luck a gold.. eeee.. i think i'll just die if the band only got a gold for syf.. so not living up to the ac name.. ah well.. we'll find out in 3days time.. *prays*.. but i have to give it up to tpjc or at least their percussion section, they did a pretty gd job.. especially sazali, gd stuff on the timpani.. if only arthur could play as well as he did.. anyway ARGH!!!! so embarrasing.. she knows!!! jillyan this is all your fault!! how am i like supposed to even talk to her now.. sheesh.. thanks ah.. it was hard enough before.. ah well.. i guess the best i can do is pretend like nothing happened and just act as per normal..

5/02/2005 09:49:00 PM